Brewer’s droop

November 5, 2017

Though the barmaid kept flirting and winking,
He went on, just steadily drinking.
The girl was damn cute;
She was up for a root,
But with each shot, his hard-on was shrinking.

Non-virgin birth

November 1, 2017

Pregnant! Well! What a great hue and cry!
A young woman of virtue, and shy!
The whole town was amazed,
And, of course, then it raised
The old questions; when, where, who and why?

The burden of responsibility

October 30, 2017

Though she did feel sort of ashamed,
She protested that she’d been defamed;
Yes, she’d screwed lots of men,
Or they her, and so then
You’d have thought that she couldn’t be blamed!

Dutch girls

October 30, 2017

They’re such hardy damn women, the Dutch;
In the snowstorms and blizzards and such,
Riding round on their bicycles,
Nipples like icicles,
Not, though, their pussies so much!


October 30, 2017

It was hard to know where to begin.
All those acres of lovely bare skin!
Firm of arse, full of breast …
Begging “Come! Be my guest!”
Such a sweet invitation to sin!

A question of price

October 29, 2017

You can have her in various ways,
Some of which would, quite frankly amaze!
She’ll do anything, really.
Well, pretty nearly!
Yep. Just a question who pays.

Square root

October 25, 2017

By some reasoning, quite convoluted,
(So clever, he was, when it suited),
He showed how she could,
And most probably would,
Since she certainly ought to, be rooted.

Father and son

October 24, 2017

On the day of his wedding, his Dad
Said “Making love’s damn simple, lad.
Lay her down, hike her dress up;
It’s just like a press-up.
She won’t like it much, but too bad!

Slumber party

October 24, 2017

Lovely, languidly loose-limbed in sleep;
Her dark nipples, through silk so thin, peep!
His hand brushes her thighs,
Then his manhood! She sighs.
Beauty, sweetly, much more than skin deep!


October 24, 2017

Alec d’Urberville, buffed boots and dressy,
Growled “Off with those knickers then, Tessie!
We’ll do the dark deed.
It will hurt. You may bleed.
You’ll be going home sticky and messy.”